Exits and Oxymorons

Exits and Oxymoron’s

And He took him outside and said, “Now look toward the heavens, and count the stars, if you are able to count them.” ... Then he believed in the LORD ... And He said to him, “I am the LORD who brought you out of UR and of the Chaldeans, to give you this land to possess it.”
~ Genesis 15:5-6, NASB ~

A large exit sign hung over the sturdy, steel door. A push bar was strategically placed mid-way on the door enhancing one's ability to believe that safety was an easy push away in the event of an unplanned evacuation.

My heart was heavy. I was leaving after a decade of nursing the hearts, minds, and bodies of the youth I had grown to love. When my eyes caught the exit sign, I understood that fresh opportunities for ministry lay beyond this land of familiar spaces, patterned schedules, and unpredictable personalities. Wet tears streamed down my cheeks until I read the sign posted on the door below the exit sign: “Absolutely no one is to open this door at any time.” The irony of an exit door with a posted warning sign not to open was too laughable for me to spend another moment teary eyed and nostalgic.

This became my “Abraham” moment. God was showing me that beyond the walls and doors of my present employment was a vast land filled with new adventures, relationships, and meaningful life work to look forward to completing. I, like Abraham, would need to believe and move past the contradiction between my feelings and what I knew to be true.

We each have been endowed with motivational gifts that compliment the life territory that God has ordained for us to possess. And just like the seasons change, our life's work will be completed on various life landscapes. We must be open and ready when God posts an exit sign and points us in a different direction. If we believe that life's exit doors are to remain closed, we will become stunted and our life's work stalled.

What new life territory has God shown you? Have you believed it is time to exit where He has you presently, or have you believed the contradiction of your feelings, friends, or fears?

Today, take a step of faith and push open the exit door God has posted. Look up and believe, and prepare to possess the new land God is showing you.

LORD, today, I will choose to cast my eyes upon you. Give me the courage to push open the doors of opportunity that you have ordained. Give me the strength to believe and trust you as I walk out into new territory.  

Please, No Door Knobs For This Girl

The Holy, the True....opening doors no one can lock,

locking doors no one can open....

~Revelation 3:3 The Message

I loathe touching public door handles. Perhaps the course in microbiology I was forced to take in nursing school burned into my mind the hidden dangers of bacteria and viruses that lurk on inanimate objects waiting to claim victory over their next innocent victim-me. I act like a one woman hazmat team when attempting to open and close public doors. 

I wish I held the same caution concerning the doors of my life. I have spent years forcing open "life doors" that have proven unfruitful and have slammed shut open "life doors" that I have viewed as ominous and threatening. The outcome has been restlessness of soul. I have felt like a frog leaping from lily pad to lily pad drowning in the life pond designed to protect and nourish me.

I am beginning to realize when God opens a  life door no effort on my part, or the part of another, can close it, and when He closes a door no one, not even me, can open it.

God assures us that His purpose and plans are specially designed to our unique personality and temperament. He will determine which doors are to be opened and which ones are to be closed. Our job is to trust Him. This trust will save us from sickness of soul and illness of mind. 

Today, I have decided to allow God to remove all the knobs on my life doors and to trust him when a door closes, or is closed, and when one opens. Will you join me?

This hands off approach is preventive medicine for the soul and a promise filled with "new dreams, new possibilities, and new beginnings." (Restored: Healing Prayers and Inspiration for Those Living with Depression by Lynne Jordan)

Today, LORD, I submit to Your Sovereign will. Hands off I stand before You. I trust your Goodness and perfect character. Open and close the life doors you have ordained for me. Amen. 

    

Marching in Place

The muddiest water clears as it is stilled. And out of that stillness life arises

~Tao~

Each fall as the air is filled with fresh smells, crisp, clean air, and brilliant colors that no artist could ever replicate, my thinking becomes clear and I experience a settled peace that no other season brings. Nostalgia sets in. The past I recall are the marching days of band. Dressed in uniform, eye steady on the drum major, instrument held ready to bring to mouth, I was ready to perform and take part of a larger purpose. We were crisp in our moves, timely in our steps, and clear in executing our notes. When we were done, we knew we had succeeded in providing the entertainment to revved up fans seeking something to fill in the wait of half-time during football season.  

Marching bands do not step out onto the field without having spent multiple hours practicing. Our band director, equipped with clipboard and megaphone, choreographed our steps and choose our tunes. We followed his direction as if life was dependent on our absolute obedience. The most demanding moments came when, listening to the drum cadence, we had to march in place. 

Marching in place often meant we had fallen out of formation, missed a note, or that the band director simply needed time to regroup and rethink the direction and intention of his destiny for us. Sometimes there would be confusion, but marching in place offered a respite during the hot days of practice and allowed us to catch our breath and think. Marching in place was also better than when we were asked to stop marching, because it was hard to regain our momentum and recapture the rhythm collectively we had marched in sync with once we stopped. 

Today, I need the life lessons that marching in place taught me. First, marching in place allows time to process direction and intent. Life's busyness often propels us forward, but being propelled forward does not equate with direction created for meaningful purpose. Second, marching in place allows you to mark time and be ready for when forward motion is necessary. Third, marching in place provides respite from a life marked by heavy demands and multiple voices crying out for help and direction. 

Often times marching in place can feel stagnant, but there are life notes to be heard in the "stillness" of marching in place. Marching in place means we have time to think, time to dream, time to recreate, so that when we do move forward there is beauty and intent to our steps. Marching in place allows us to breathe so that when we play our "life notes" they are played in tune and on time. People need the beauty of a life lived well and marching in place is where muddy waters clear and life arises. This year, spend time marching in place and enjoy the clarity that this practice can bring. 

Father, I am willing to march in place. Provide clarity and direction as I listen for your direction. Help me keep my rhythm in stillness so that I am ready to move forward at your beckoning. Let my life be beauty and inspiration for those watching me march for you. 

Wrinkle Cream, Integrity, or Both?

For we have been consumed by Your anger and by Your wrath we have been dismayed. You have placed our iniquities before You, our secret sins in the light of Your presence. For all our days have declined in Your fury; We have finished our years like a sigh. As for the days of our life, they contain seventy years, or if due to strength, eighty years; yet their pride is but labor and sorrow; for soon it is gone and we fly away....So teach us to number our days, that we may present to You a heart of wisdom.

Psalm 90: 7-12

I have been a nurse for nearly 30 years. One statistic I repeatedly share with people is that 10 out of 10 people die. I have never seen this statistic altered in spite of advanced health care technology, new medicines, brilliant doctors and researchers, detox diets, and wrinkle creams. People die-with or without wrinkles. People die young, old and every age in-between. People die with billions of dollars in their bank accounts or barely enough money to be buried. Good, bad, righteous and evil, all people die. 

I realize my life goal is to convey hope, and I am fairly confident that most of you reading this do not feel very hopeful. But as I read this psalm, I am struck by the message it speaks to me-Life is brief, but our biggest problem is not how brief life is, but the sin in our life. 

Why does this psalm address sin? Because sin shortens our life. Repeatedly, God instructs us to live clean, pure, and righteous, so that our days will be lengthened. Do righteous people die young? Yes. But, we also know that God is sovereign, and the number of our days belong to him. So, what is our response to be? Do we fight to live longer by believing in the power of modern-day medicine and anti-aging miracles? Do we continue to slather billions of dollars worth of wrinkle cream on our faces and necks to deny the fact we are aging and are going to die? Do we live with integrity and wisdom ignoring the use of advanced technology and wrinkle creams? Or can we do both?

I believe integrity and wrinkle cream can abide together, along with the use of modern technology. The difference in our life success and longevity, however, will be determined by our focus. This psalm exhorts us to grasp the brevity of life, so that we will live this life with wisdom. J. I. Packer writes:

Be wholly committed to Christ’s service each day. Don’t touch sin with a barge-pole. Keep short accounts with God. Think of each hour as God’s gift to you, to make the most and best of. Plan your life, budgeting for 70 years (Psalm 90:10), and understanding that if your time proves shorter, it will not be unfair deprivation but rapid promotion. Never let the good, or the not-so-good, crowd out the best, and cheerfully forgo what is not the best for the sake of what is. Live in the present; gratefully enjoy its pleasures and work through its pain with God, knowing that both the pleasures and the pains are steps on the journey home. Open all your life to the Lord Jesus and spend time consciously in his company, basking in and responding to his love. Say to yourself often that every day is one day nearer. Remember that, as George Whitefield said, man is immortal until his work is done (though God alone defines the work), and get on with what you know to be God’s task for you here and now.

We cannot minimize the impact of sin in our life. God does not. Live with integrity. Live for Christ. Psalm 90 ends in verse 17 by stating, "Let the favor of the Lord our God be upon us; and confirm for us the work of our hands; yes, confirm the work of our hands." You see, God provided this life for us to bring glory to Him through our work. Sin distorts His glory and shortens our life. I have decided to live for Christ regardless of the number of days ordained, and I will do this with the aid of wrinkle cream and modern day technology. When I die, it will not matter the state of my skin or my health, but my soul. Today, in wisdom, seek the forgiveness Christ has to offer and live with integrity, in sickness or in health, and with or without wrinkles. 

Today, Father, teach me how to wisely invest the life You ordained. There is a difference between spending and investing. Teach me how to invest into eternal purposes. And like Jonathan Edwards proclaims, "Stamp eternity on my eyeballs!"

What Will Be Your First?

Things which eye has not seen and ear has not heard, and which have not entered the heart of man, all that God has prepared for those who love Him. 

1 Corinthians 2:9

As I reflect on the many "firsts" I have had in my life, I feel the warmth of love and tenderness of having had experienced these precious and priceless moments. The first word my oldest daughter spoke at the age of 6 months. The first time she reached out her little hands to be held and hugged. The first time she ate spaghetti and wore more on her face than consumed in her tiny belly. Her first hair cut. The moment my daughter looked up at me on her third birthday and asked, "Is my two all gone?" The first child to graduate high school and then college. The first time the man who would become my husband would reach out and take my hand and place it into his. The moment I remember feeling loved and accepted by someone other than my family. My very first nursing job after graduating nursing school. The moment I reached my goal of getting through grad school and getting to don the garments bestowed on those who survived. Yes, I have had many wonderful firsts and I anticipate a future filled with them. 

Christ reminds us that in Him we can anticipate, and journey life with excitement, because He is preparing for us a kingdom filled with things that our eyes have not seen nor our ears have heard nor our minds can even conceive. Jesus, a man who died to let us experience eternity filled with firsts. The first time I look into the face of the Man who died for me and declared "clean and forgiven." The first time I will wake up knowing that eternity promises to be free from body aches and pain, difficult relationships, disease, disasters, hate, evil, jealousy, lies, abuse, fatigue, strife, drudgery, and trials of various kinds. Jesus, a man who promises to fill my heart with love the first time I see Him face to face. 

What will be my first? I can only Imagine, as the song by MercyMe goes. 

                                                 I can only imagine 

What it will be like 
When I walk 
By your side 

I can only imagine 
What my eyes will see 
When your face 
Is before me 
I can only imagine 

[Chorus:]
Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel 
Will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still 
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I fall 
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all 
I can only imagine 

I can only imagine 
When that day comes 
And I find myself 
Standing in the Son 

I can only imagine 
When all I will do 
Is forever 
Forever worship You 
I can only imagine

What will be your first? Come to Jesus, and with great anticipation, Imagine. 

Father, today I come to You with excitement and anticipation as I imagine the joy of what will be my first moment in Your presence. Keep my eyes and heart upon you. Hope does not disappoint (Romans 5:5) and You, Jesus, are my hope. 

Who or What is Light Source?

"The eye is the lamp of your body; when your eye is clear; your whole body is full of light; but when it is bad, your body also is full of darkness."

Luke 11:34

"Walk as children of light."

Ephesians 5:8

Most recently I have been filled with a persona that has been anything but light bearing or light giving. Darkness has been invading my soul, and like any dark room, you are bound to bump into things or people and incur personal or collateral damage. My damage has been collateral, as my oldest daughter plainly conveyed to me. In the darkness of my soul, I have been bumping into the hearts and emotions of my family members. 

Not understanding where the light of my soul had taken refuge, I came upon a quote by Kim McMillin in her book, When I Loved Myself Enough. McMillen writes, "I learned that when I am feeling pain it is because I am living outside the truth." Yes, I have been living outside of the truth, so it makes sense why darkness has been my friend. 

What is this truth I have been living outside of? It is the same truth that many people forget: That the approval of people, the perfect job, respectful children who live neat and tidy, stress free relationships, checkbooks that balance, friends that remember you, families that live in perfect and peaceful harmony, a world that extends forgiveness, houses that never need cleaning, newscasts that highlight peace and tranquility among the nations, circumstances that lead to favorable outcomes, and a schedule that is balanced with perfect margin for breathing space are not necessary in defining or fulfilling one's purpose. People, jobs, nor relationships provide the guiding light of truth. All of these sources are really shadows cast over the true source of light-God himself.

Luke states that the eye is the lamp of the body, and that when the eye is clear, we are filled with light. So, it comes down to focus. Focus sets my heart in motion. If my eyes are focused on the one who is the true source of light, then my heart and soul will not languish from a darkness that prevails, or an exhaustion that defeats. Yes, I have been depending on others and circumstances to be my guiding light. Instead, I found darkness.

God is the true light, and He is truth. He reminds me that my identity is in him alone. The pain I feel living in the fragile shadows of false light or truths disappear when He becomes my focus. My purpose becomes clear, and I am absent of the emptiness of depending on others to fill and sustain me. "The Lord is my portion, says my soul, therefore I have hope in Him." (Lamentations 3:24)

Who or what is your source of light? Remember, whomever or whatever you follow as your light becomes your identity. Today, identify with God and allow Him to illuminate the truth of who you are: walk in the power and discovery of His guidance and provision.

Father, when I sit in darkness, remind me that I am not following the true light-You. Help me to recognize when I have allowed the outcome of circumstances or the approval or others to replace You. You alone are my hope. In You alone I walk in truth. Thank you for revealing Truth. Thank You for being Light.

  

  

Cup of Algae Anyone?

If anyone is thirsty, let him come to Me and drink

John 7:37

I love fresh eggs. My family has raised chickens since 2000, because I am convinced that the only good egg is the one you retrieve everyday from your personal poultry flock. In recent years I have enjoyed experimenting with a variety of breeds, simply because I enjoy the colors and plumage of these distinct birds. My current flock is beautiful, and I have enjoyed their color and markings. 

Birds like people need daily care. My husband consistently tends to our flock during the nine-month school year, while I take over during the summer months. In our recent transition between him ending his care and me taking over, we lost one of my favorite birds. She had not been sick, to my knowledge, nor had she shown any signs of illness until the day before her death. I mused over the possible cause of death. 

As I began my daily summer care, I noticed that the water container my husband had set out was discolored. Upon further inspection, I was shocked to discover that the water was filled with blue-green algae growth. Had my husband not changed their water? How could he have not noticed the pea-soup colored water? Further, I discovered a swimming pool filled with stagnant water covered in blue-green algae that was tucked behind the chicken coop. Mystery solved. My chicken had died from drinking water contaminated from an over growth of blue-green algae, which can produce a deadly toxin. I went from being sorrowful over the loss of my one hen to grateful that the remaining 29 had actually survived. I removed the pool immediately and scrubbed the water container and filled it with clean, fresh water. 

Drinking algae contaminated water is not a practice I recommend, but many of us daily drink from spiritually contaminated containers filled with "spiritual algae" in an attempt to satisfy our longing and thirsty souls. Our minds and intellect thirst, and we often quench this with material that leaves us panting and dissatisfied. Our souls and emotions thirst too, and we turn to the culture that can leave our souls languishing.  

Jesus is the only source from which our souls can daily drink from and be satisfied. His  "spiritual water" is filled with Hope, Compassion, Loving-kindness, Forgiveness, Justice, Peace, Patience, Gentleness, Love, and Goodness. His guarantee is that when we drink from His "water container" we will never thirst again (John 4:14).

What "cup of algae" have you been drinking? Although you may not think your drinking hole is contaminated,  it may be that there is a delayed reaction and that the full impact of your choice has not yet been realized. My hen died. Are you in the process of dying spiritually or emotionally? Today, choose to drink from a source that is pure and clean and promises life eternal and life in abundance. Today, choose Jesus. 

Jesus, thank you for offering "spiritual water" that is pure and promises life eternal. Thank you that your love and kindness never cease and your compassion never fails. Today, I choose to drink from the fountain that sustains and satisfies. Today, I choose you. Amen.